Spiraling Toward Irrelevancy

Never has a blog title spoken quicker to the absolute truth than "Spiraling Toward Irrelevancy" ...


Future Headline: Giant Baghdad Ferris Wheel Exploded by Godless, Sand Worshiping Heathens

Current Headline: "Baghdad Plans to Build Giant Ferris Wheel"

BAGHDAD - Iraq is calling on companies to submit designs to build a giant Ferris wheel in Baghdad — the latest in a string of lavish proposals painting the capital as a leisure friendly city.

The Ferris wheel, dubbed the Baghdad Eye, will soar more than 650 feet over the city and feature air-conditioned compartments that would each carry up to 30 passengers, Baghdad municipal spokesman Adel al-Ardawi said Wednesday.

Three possible locations in Baghdad have been selected, but officials are waiting to see what proposals are submitted before picking one, al-Ardawi said, declining to give an estimated construction cost or timeline.

"We hope to attract a great number of customers who will be able to see the whole city and enjoy the restaurants and pools on ground below," he told The Associated Press.

More: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26425911/

The Obajma Hall

Photographed from a respectful distance, we see the platform from which His Holiness will make his acceptance speech Thursday night. Hopefully with the Soviet National Anthem played gently underneath.


I liked this better the first time, when it was called Atlas Shrugged.

From The Seasteading Institute:

"What is 'Seasteading'?

"Seasteading means to create permanent dwellings on the ocean - homesteading the high seas. A seastead, like in the picture above, is a structure meant for permanent occupation on the ocean.

"Why would you want to do that?

"Because the world needs a new frontier, a place where those who are dissatisfied with our current civilization can go to build a different (and hopefully better) one."

Et cetera.


TGO Radio Production Notes (Part Two)

Full test shows were recorded on each of the last two Wednesdays. If it were only up to me, this gross experiment would have ended about 730pm yesterday, at the conclusion of the second test, which was shapeless and horrible. (So bad, in fact, I’ve made no attempt to listen to or edit the finished product.)

I’m willing to allow that my skepticism could, in part, stem from other light duty depressions and general fatigue nearing the end of this long, busy summer. But there was a general unhappiness among the TGO Radio staff at the conclusion of the second test. At that point, Jeff looked across the desk at me and wondered aloud what was missing – everything feels (and sounds) unnatural and forced. We both shook our heads.

As we parted ways I told Jeff to email me his ideas as to the show generally – in all likelihood, the entire format will have to be torn down and rebuilt from the ground, and we’re all going to have to work a lot harder at show prep (that means you, Doug Reacharound, you doughnut eating and champagne drinking bitch) which, frankly, is difficult, given that everything around us (from this awful election down) is insufferably boring.

Still, my being tired of being alive shouldn’t weigh the show down.

As decisions are made, notes will be posted here.


Preview; I.O.U.S.A.

Screenings all over the country this Thursday. Check the website for details.


TGO Radio Production Notes

Various test recordings for TGO Radio were conducted on Saturday, 2 August and Wednesday, 6 August. Here are some production notes.

Several pieces of audio have been recorded, ranging in length from five to thirty minutes. The funniest so far was culled from the Wednesday session and is called “Jenna Jameson is Pregnant,” a delightfully pornographic mix of news, speculation as to the size of Jameson’s womanhood, and a playing of the classic Big Dick Blaque segment from Hardcore.

By and large, though, I am terribly torn.

On one hand, the equipment on which we have recorded the tests is brand new and so much better (i.e., faster) than the old set-up. It requires much more fine-tuning than the old set-up, meaning mainly that I’ve spent a lot of time sitting around, pounding shortbread cookies into my fat maw, drinking water and flat Diet Coke, and watching. (This was quite bothersome to me at first, because I’m a control freak, but in the second meeting Wednesday I talked myself out of most of that.)

We now have a tenable system in place for conducting phone interviews – it’s simpler than you’d suspect, but I’m not going to give it away. And it looks as though Jeff and I will both have access to the Interweb during the shows, which was a very hit-and-miss (and one sided, in my direction) proposition three years ago.

But in listening to and editing the clips, I’m hearing problems that, to this point, aren’t being solved. It will seem silly to read, but a small amount of these are corrected when the clips are piped through better speakers (so remember that, if a second season commences), but mostly the objections boil down to two things. One: Whereas during the first season our voices sounded more like we were sitting next to you, there is something flat and tinny about them as recorded on the new equipment.

Two: We are having some problems finding a proper mix between our voices and any ancillary audio played underneath us. Either the underneath stuff is so loud it splits the eardrums, or it is just loud enough to drown us out, or it is so soft we are burying it with casual conversation. These are problems that would require significant editing (including, probably, far too much cutting) to fix in post-production, which is why it’s better to get them settled now.

For the first set of problems I am at a loss. Regarding the second I believe I know how to fix them. Our problem could be that we are straying too significantly from the meat and potatoes method of recording we employed three years ago. Back then, virtually every piece of audio beyond our voices was played using one program. In that case, when we found a level at which to mix this one player, it was left alone to do its job and functioned well.

It seems that this time out we are trying too hard to be too cute. In addition to our voices, which are obviously recorded at a static level, we are seeking out and playing, on the fly, various pieces of audio from sources that employ different sorts of media players, none of which are pre-mixed to our general specifications. In other words, when seeking previously unforeseen clips in the future, we will have to employ a more deliberate method (which, of course, I have devised).

Worse coming to worse, the old recording equipment could very easily be pulled out of retirement and thrown back into service; like a retired battleship. So whatever is wrong with the recording could be fixed, temporarily with the old stuff, while the bugs are worked out of the new system. What could really cripple TGO Radio is our inability to formulate a coherent format. We both agree that the upcoming elections are far too important to ignore, and that the various idiocies of the candidates must be discussed at appropriate length.

On the other hand, neither of us can bypass the opportunity to speculate as to the exact size of Jenna Jameson’s vaginal opening, on account of the five thousand cocks she’s stuffed into that poor, suffering orifice over the many years, when she ends up with child.

There has got to be a way to combine the two things. Dammed if we can figure out what it is.


Um ... TGO Radio?

Interesting and sudden developments regarding TGO Radio, the Internet radio show that will not die, even though three years have passed since the conclusion of the first (and only) season.

As this is being posted, Jeff, interim producer extraordinaire Doug Reacharound, and your humble correspondent are gathering at an undisclosed location in Northern Indiana to test new wave recording equipment for the first of two new TGO Radio test shows, to be recorded next week. (Former show producer Ron Mexico may be rejoining us someday, and his absence will be explained in due course. In the meantime, Doug will produce these test shows.)

To say anything after this would constitute rumor and conjecture, but I can say with the utmost confidence that frantic equipment testing is underway, wild construction has begun at Camp TGO’s “recording studio" - everything else is in flux. Updates as they warrant.

(Shown below, some of our new wave equipment.)